I cannot count the amount of times I have wanted to start a new habit or create a new schedule for myself and my family. When you have a big family, lots of animals and a full time job, life is ever changing. That is why our schedules, habits and priorities change as we grow and learn. With these changes also comes with new habits that need to be built.
Before you go changing anything, you should give yourself time to define the meaning of this new habit you want to take on. Why are you doing it? Why is it important? When does it need to happen in your day? How flexible can you be?
It can be difficult to start a new habit. It is one thing to talk about it and another to actually do it. That is why anytime I want to start a new habit, I pair it with an old one. For example, when I started a new medicine, I left the bottle by my toothbrush so I wouldn't forget to take it. I know I am going to brush my teeth every morning so by putting the bottle there, it provides a reminder for me to take the medicine either before or after I am done brushing my teeth.
It can also be helpful to set a timer for yourself or have an accountability partner. Having soemthing hold you accountable can be a great way to avoid talking yourself out of something.
With that being said, it is also usually a good idea to not try to change too many things at once. This can be overwhelming for your brain. I know for me, I can be overly ambitious sometimes and I will want to revamp my whole morning routine. That will last maybe three days before I get burnt out. My recommendation, take it slow. Change one thing at a time and pair your new thing with an old one. This will give you a much higher probability to incorporate your new thing into your routine and schedule. Before you know it, it will be second nature.
There is something to be said about waking up everyday and not dreading your work day. I think there are too many people out there who hate their jobs, their boss and the work week. I am lucky enough to not have those thoughts anymore. I have found myself in a job that I love, a boss who is amazing and a work week that doesn't always feel like work.
I worked really hard for this life. I made it a point to be in this position. I have had my fair share of shitty jobs, horrible bosses and dreaded work weeks. Over time, I have made it a point to curate my "work day" to be something I love.
In addition to my day job, I am someone who is a hobbyist. I enjoy reading, writing, doing puzzles, knitting, diamond art, arts and crafts projects, scrapbooking, word searches. I am not someone who gets bored. I have so many things I enjoy doing. I am not much of an outdoor person but I am starting to really like hiking and trying different trails with my dog.
With that all being said, I have always had a passion for sharing these things with others. I enjoy making content around my everyday life. I aspire to be a mom who inspires other moms to continue their passions and hobbies as well. Motherhood is an all consuming lifestyle and it is so easy to lose yourself in that life. I believe it is important to set aside time for those things you love so you can remain a good mom and do things for yourself. It is self-care. We don’t do enough of it as mothers. We are so busy making sure everyone else is cared for and where they need to be that we forget to plan things for ourselves.
Things that I do to ensure I can be present in my full-time job, side hustle and mother
I have learned that balance and planning are the key strategies to make anything successful. I know that if I want to be happy and successful, I need to plan my day in a way that helps me get everything done that needs to be done, make time to spend meaningful moments with my family, and set aside time to create content around my hobbies and writing so I can share what I have learned with you.
Every morning I take out my planner and look at my day. I have two calendars I need to consider, my full-time job calendar and my personal one. I need to make sure that I am attending meetings, school activities, after school activities, appointments, practices etc. You know the drill. Once I know specific time frames, then I can plan my content creation around that. Additionally, I make it a point to carve out time with each person in my family to spend time with.
When I say this, I need you to know that this is not as overwhelming as it may seem. When I carve out time for my family, it means that I do something meaningful with each one. Maybe it's a board game, or reading a chapter together. Maybe I am building an army guy castle out of magna-tiles or watching a show. The important thing to take from this is, it doesn’t have to be hours of time. It just needs to be meaningful. I feel like as a mom we feel so much pressure to do all of these amazing adventures and spend tons of money but when you think of your childhood, what do you remember doing with your family? I think of playing Monopoly, going to the beach, car rides with music. More often than not, I think of the smaller things we did. When my parents went out, my brothers and I would order Dominos and have a movie night. The smaller things can make a big impact. I think spending time with your kids, no matter what you do with them, will be far more memorable than going to the trampoline park every weekend.
Life is about meaningful moments. If you can go to the recital, if you miss one, don’t let that guilt take over. Chances are your kid won’t hold that over your head for the rest of your life because you will be making so many other memories with them. Losing that mom guilt is really something I am working on as well. It is so hard, but I know that hanging on to it won't do anyone any good.
I hope that with this “side-hustle” content creation thing I have going on, that I can inspire moms to bring more balance to their lives, bring back their passions or to hold on to those they have managed to hold on to. And to let go of that mom guilt. It is so important to take care of ourselves too. Just like on a plane, if you don't put on your oxygen mask first, you can't help anyone around you.
Take care of yourself Mama!
I have recently come to the conclusion that I need to grow up. I never quite realized how immature I am. I mean I knew, but never really sat with it until recently. I was at a get together with friends about a week ago and I was the youngest one there. I made a comment that mostly fell flat. There was some laughs but I think it was more laughter out of how appalling I was being rather then being funny.
It was good though because it opened my eyes. It was not a profession scenario but still, I think it says something about my personal growth journey. There are moments when I want to let loose and just be and I think that needs to be kept sacred with my best friend and maybe not with everyone else. I think it values what we have even more. That person you can be fully yourself with without any judgement and just to let it all be. Then there are times when maybe you should hold back a little. Not everyone is meant to get every part of you. Maybe it is good that we collect ourselves in a manner that is more respectable with mixed company.
Either way, the interaction has altered my state of mine in a good way. I think it brings light to who I am currently, who I want to be and what I am looking for. I think it can be a good thing to be more mindful of what you say and how you behave within certain situations.
I am celebrating my 40th birthday today and packing for a trip to Iceland. It is a perfect time to get away, reflect on life and explore a new country. I look forward to this journey and I think it will be a great transition into my next chapter of life. I look forward to sharing my new insights, how I plan to grow more personally and the behavior changes and strategies I will use to get myself to my next goal.
I appreciate all of the love and support for you all. Heres to more growth together! 🥂
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